This is What Happens When My iPod is on Shuffle

My taste in music is very eclectic. On my iPod, I have everyone from Tupac to Garth Brooks, Chris Tomlin to ZZ Top. Like I said: eclectic.


I’ve already gone through Friends seasons 1-10, so for my background noise today, I turned on my iPod and just hit shuffle. I was in the zone and wrote for a good while when a song came on that made me stop. It was Jolene by Dolly Parton.


I’m sure most of you have heard it. The tale of a housewife begging some red-headed harlot to keep her hands off Dolly’s man. As I listened to the words, many thoughts ran through my head.


First: Dolly! Get a grip…on Jolene’s neck.

If a woman that knew Huff the Hubs was married (seriously girls, a quick glance at the left hand will suffice) and was trying to steal him away for sport, you best believe I’d go from Southern Belle to South-Side in two seconds. I’m sure Dolly was trying to be “lady-like” about it, but come on! You are Dolly Parton! I know you’ve got some backwoods breeding in you! Take a page from Loretta Lynn’s handbook!


Second: Do you really want a guy that would be so easily entranced by another woman?

Whenever I was dating, I’d see guys that were in relationships be totally transfixed by other girls (maybe Jolene was part veela). They’d forget all about the person they calimed to love and would follow around other girls (aka, Jolene’s) around like puppies. Or, as the HIMYM gang refers to it, they’d be on the hook.


And finally: Dolly, you were (and still are) so pretty! You could do better.

I mean, seriously. Look at Dolly during the “Jolene Days”

Hellloooooo Dolly!


I searched for the back-story on Jolene. Turns out that Dolly got the inspiration from a red-headed bank teller that constantly flirted with her husband. Then, after a show one night she met a young red-headed girl that wanted an autograph. Dolly asked her what her name was and she said: “Jolene,” to which Dolly replied: “Jolene, Jolene, Jolene…that’s a pretty name. I think I’ll use that in a song.”


I’m assuming the bank teller didn’t get her way; Dolly and her husband just celebrated their 45th wedding anniversary!

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