Mommy Monday

Mommy Monday Header Beach

 

I was wasting time on Facebook the other day and saw this meme which made me laugh because I could totally relate:

thomas-abowd-thomasabowd-yeah-i-can-fit-it-in-my-35832206

But then I started thinking: I don’t want that kind of life. I don’t want to constantly be saying “Yes” to everything and wearing myself out. Over the past few years–probably since around the time that Huff the Babe was born–I’ve been trying to not take on so much stuff and I’ve been working on saying “no” more often. Thought, I sometimes still  overwhelm myself, but I feel like I’ve gotten better at declining than I used to be. I’ve noticed this typically seems to happen to women–we actually become addicted to being busy/taking on enormous amounts of responsibility. (I’m not talking about stuff that needs to be done, e.g. laundry, dishes, caring for our young. I’m talking about the extras.)

 

giphy (18)

 

The subject of busyness is actually being studied as an addiction. Yep, you read that right. Just like drugs, alcohol, or food, people more and more are using busy schedules to numb themselves/distract from problems they are unable to face.

If I keep myself busy enough, I won’t have time to be anxious.

My schedule is jam-packed; now I don’t have to think about how my marriage is falling apart. 

Go here, go there, and do this. No time to think about my feelings of unworthiness. 

But keeping ourselves busy and not getting down to the root of why we’re keeping ourselves busy is just perpetuating the problem. We are making ourselves sick with the constant hustle and bustle of getting to places we “need” to be… but did you ever stop to think about where you want to be? Do you want to be driving to and from extracurricular activities every single evening? And I’m not knocking extracurriculars; I think they’re a great way for kids to learn perseverance, teamwork, and cooperation. But if you’re spending 99.99% of your time in the car, scarfing down your dinner in between pick-ups and drop-offs, with no time to invest in the relationships around you, maybe take a beat and take stock.

Are you constantly feeling overwhelmed? 

Do you see your kids less and less because of the continuous full calendar?

Are you not sleeping well?

If this is you (I’ve been there)  try to start saying “no”. I know,: its easier said than done. But, sometimes, the best thing a mom can do for her family, her marriage, and her own sanity is to say “no”.

You don’t have to head up every single fundraiser.

You don’t have to sew costumes every Halloween.

You don’t have to be at the church every time the doors are open.

You don’t have to bake cookies for the team’s snack.

You don’t have to have hand-stitched napkins at Christmas dinner.

You don’t have to do it all.

One more time for the ladies in the back: You don’t have to do it all

Again, I’m not saying that any of these things are bad, per se. What I’m saying is, if you are constantly running and never feel like you’re getting ahead; if you cart the kids to and from all weekend and lay in bed on Sunday night, thinking about how you barely saw your children; if you feel like you and your husband are “two ships passing in the night”, think about areas in your life that you can say “no”. By taking on a lot, we’re also missing out on a lot.

To quote author Mary Katherine, contributor on Scary Mommy: “…most of us can probably let go of a few things go without the world falling down around us. We will be doing ourselves, and our families, a huge favor too. Because important things are happening in quiet moments, mamas. And you deserve to experience them.”

Yes.

Yes, you do.

Mommy Monday

Mommy Monday Header Rad Mom

 

Right now, we’re in a lovely phase of parenting Huff the Babe. Wait, I mean we’re in a loathsome phase of parenting: the two year old stage.

Its less than pleasant.

help-me-gif-7.gif

 

And its not just because its the “terrible twos”, so much. Its because, this time around, its “the-terrible-BOY-twos”.

But Jessica, you say, surely its the same as it was with Huff the Tot. 

To which I reply:

e8a

 

The Boy Twos are infinitely different than The Girl Twos.

With The Girl Twos, there’s a lot of crying. Emotions are constantly on high and frustrations are endless. When you’ve got a girl going through the two year old phase, she wants to choose her own clothes, she wants to dance constantly, and she cries at the drop of the hat.

giphy (16)

That, I totally get. After all, I’m a woman. I get that estrogen is basically like an amphetamine that can make you crazy and cry about weird stuff like I did when Cassini made its grand finale.

 

The Boy Twos however are nothing but running, screaming, throwing, hitting, flailing on the floor, and destruction.

chaos-gif-17

The Boys Twos are all about fighting anything and everything.

Mommy wants to change your diaper? DO NOT LET HER. Its clearly a trap to suck out your soul. Run, hide, twist and turn as she uses baby wipes on you. Whatever you do, RESIST! 

You need to put your shoes on? Shoes? You mean death shackles?! Hurry, throw them under the dryer so your parents have to waste thirty minutes moving everything out of the laundry room to grab one flip flop. 

The chocolate milk you demanded was served in a blue cup instead of a green one?! INSUBORDINATION! Throw the cup on the ground so it cracks and spills chocolate milk everywhere! 

The Boy Twos leave you physically exhausted. They make every muscle in your body sore because you’ve spent the day wrestling with something the size of a puppy that has the strength of a silver-back gorilla. The Boy Twos leave you counting down the hours until bedtime. Not bath time, mind you, because THAT is a whole other beast of its own in which you will be soaked as well as tired.

J0Sb8yR.gif

 

But…The Boy Twos are also unexpected cuddles. They are “I wuv eww”s as you hand over their favorite truck while tucking them in at night. The Boy Twos are “I want Momma”s and holding sweet, dirt-covered hands. The Boy Twos are cars and trains and dinosaurs. The Boy Twos are hard. But The Boy Twos are also precious.

giphy (17)

Mommy Monday

mommy-monday2

 

Sometimes I feel like I’m losing my mind, being a mom of littles. But then I see people with tweens and teens and praise God that I’m still in the “toddler/little kid” phase of child-rearing. Why am I so glad that I have ankle-biters instead of angsty, pre-pubescent young adults? One reason: FLOSSING.

Y’all. I just can’t with this dance. Before this ridiculous trend there was The Dab. That too, irked me beyond all measure. Why? I don’t know. Maybe I’m really just a grumpy old man in a 33-year-old’s body.

 

3fvf.gif

 

But seriously. I’m over it. Flossing needs to be filed under “Trends To Disappear in 2018” along with LOL Surprises, Fortnite, and political posts on Facebook. I know for a fact I’m not the only parent out there that feels this way. The Holderness Family did a video about it!

 

200_d (1)

Mommy Monday

Mommy Monday Header Beach

 

The other day, I felt like a chicken with my head cut off. I had so many errands to run, places to go, and things to get accomplished. The kids and I will soon be back at our church’s Mother’s Day Out program and Huff the Tot’s birthday party is next weekend so there’s been a lot to prep.

After a whirlwind day of shopping, organizing, writing, cutting out lamination, and wrapping gifts and goody bags, I collapsed on my bed at 10:00 p.m. I almost immediately  sat back up.

Did the kids get at least two servings of fruit today? 

Did I give them enough attention? 

Was I too short-tempered? 

Did I give them enough hugs? Kisses? 

Should I have read one more book at bedtime? 

This is almost a daily ritual with me. Its like I can’t go to sleep until I’ve listed all the things I’ve done wrong as a mom and vowed to make the next day better.

As I wrestled with myself about how much of a terrible mother I was, I started mindlessly scrolling through Facebook. Then, I came across a video a friend had posted. (I’m not entirely sure who Rachel Hollis is, but I’m glad she made this video!) It was EXACTLY what I needed to hear. In the short video, she says God made you and your child a perfect match. She elaborates by telling the worn-out, worried mom:

“You can’t fail at a job you were created to do.” 

WOW.

That got me. I started crying and told myself that I know for a fact my children went to bed that night knowing that I love them. And THAT was proof I wasn’t failing.

Here’s the video in case you need to hear her words of wisdom too, Momma. You’re doing great.

Mommy Monday

mommy-monday2

 

I’ve been working really hard at losing a few pounds/getting back into shape the past few months (I’ve really let myself slack this summer) and that means Momma is taking in fewer calories than she’s burning. Which means I am hungry quite often. And when I’m hungry, well, its not a pretty sight.

BoilingNeedyApisdorsatalaboriosa-size_restricted

 

So when I saw this video from The Holderness Family, it spoke to me on a spiritual level.

 

Can you (or your kiddos) relate?

Mommy Monday

mommy-monday

About a week ago, Huff the Hubs and I decided it was time for Huff the Babe to upgrade to a “big boy bed”. We took the crib apart and assembled his Lightning McQueen bed. He was SUPER excited about his “car car” bed and we were interested to see how it went. He did SURPRISINGLY well. Better than we could have imagined, actually. Nothing like when Huff the Tot first got her princess bed. It was a lot like this:

 

Can you relate?

 

Mommy Monday

mommy-monday2

 

Do any of y’all have a picky eater in your house? I do.

Well, my kids aren’t so much “picky” as they are selective. They’ll eat chicken nuggets on day and rave about how good they are. The next day, however, they will declare that nuggets are disgusting (blasphemy!) and the only thing they want is dried spaghetti noodles that rolled under the cupboard two weeks ago.

I know I can’t be the only parent who’s dealt with this, because the folks over at YouTube channel The Dad have made a hilarious video featuring the trials of a picky eater, parodied of the show we all know and love: Fixer Upper.

 

Demo day for the pb&j!