Mommy Monday

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Right now, we’re in a lovely phase of parenting Huff the Babe. Wait, I mean we’re in a loathsome phase of parenting: the two year old stage.

Its less than pleasant.

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And its not just because its the “terrible twos”, so much. Its because, this time around, its “the-terrible-BOY-twos”.

But Jessica, you say, surely its the same as it was with Huff the Tot. 

To which I reply:

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The Boy Twos are infinitely different than The Girl Twos.

With The Girl Twos, there’s a lot of crying. Emotions are constantly on high and frustrations are endless. When you’ve got a girl going through the two year old phase, she wants to choose her own clothes, she wants to dance constantly, and she cries at the drop of the hat.

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That, I totally get. After all, I’m a woman. I get that estrogen is basically like an amphetamine that can make you crazy and cry about weird stuff like I did when Cassini made its grand finale.

 

The Boy Twos however are nothing but running, screaming, throwing, hitting, flailing on the floor, and destruction.

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The Boys Twos are all about fighting anything and everything.

Mommy wants to change your diaper? DO NOT LET HER. Its clearly a trap to suck out your soul. Run, hide, twist and turn as she uses baby wipes on you. Whatever you do, RESIST! 

You need to put your shoes on? Shoes? You mean death shackles?! Hurry, throw them under the dryer so your parents have to waste thirty minutes moving everything out of the laundry room to grab one flip flop. 

The chocolate milk you demanded was served in a blue cup instead of a green one?! INSUBORDINATION! Throw the cup on the ground so it cracks and spills chocolate milk everywhere! 

The Boy Twos leave you physically exhausted. They make every muscle in your body sore because you’ve spent the day wrestling with something the size of a puppy that has the strength of a silver-back gorilla. The Boy Twos leave you counting down the hours until bedtime. Not bath time, mind you, because THAT is a whole other beast of its own in which you will be soaked as well as tired.

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But…The Boy Twos are also unexpected cuddles. They are “I wuv eww”s as you hand over their favorite truck while tucking them in at night. The Boy Twos are “I want Momma”s and holding sweet, dirt-covered hands. The Boy Twos are cars and trains and dinosaurs. The Boy Twos are hard. But The Boy Twos are also precious.

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Mommy Monday

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Sometimes I feel like I’m losing my mind, being a mom of littles. But then I see people with tweens and teens and praise God that I’m still in the “toddler/little kid” phase of child-rearing. Why am I so glad that I have ankle-biters instead of angsty, pre-pubescent young adults? One reason: FLOSSING.

Y’all. I just can’t with this dance. Before this ridiculous trend there was The Dab. That too, irked me beyond all measure. Why? I don’t know. Maybe I’m really just a grumpy old man in a 33-year-old’s body.

 

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But seriously. I’m over it. Flossing needs to be filed under “Trends To Disappear in 2018” along with LOL Surprises, Fortnite, and political posts on Facebook. I know for a fact I’m not the only parent out there that feels this way. The Holderness Family did a video about it!

 

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Try It Tuesday

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I don’t know about you, but this momma loves her coffee! Honestly, I loved it even before I was a mom! The other day I was really craving a cold coffee drink but A) I didn’t want to pay $7 for something and B) I couldn’t afford it calorie-wise (I’m trying REALLY hard to hit my macros between now and our trip in November). So I decided I’d do a little experimenting!

I brewed some coffee and then poured it into an ice cube tray.

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Then I waited for it to freeze (a couple of hours). When the coffee cubes were frozen, I threw about 5 into my blender, along with 1 1/2 cups unsweetened almond milk, one heaping tablespoon of my favorite protein powder, and two packets of Stevia.

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Y’all… this was SO. GOOD. And even though it was right around 100 calories, it still felt like an indulgence without derailing my progress! Woot, woot!

 

Have you ever tried something like this? What did you do? Share in the comments below!

Fan Girl Friday

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I gotta be real with y’all. I meant to post this special-themed Fan Girl Friday weeks ago! *face palm* But, life happened, and I was just way too busy and completely forgot! Maybe I should invest in a Remebrall… Anywhoo, with Harry Potter’s birthday not too long ago and the release of the HP and Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them Lego minifig line, I thought it would be totally appropriate to highlight some fabulous finds from the wizarding world! Hold on to your Nimbuses, folks!

Look sweet while promoting your favorite candy shop in Hogsmeade with this a-DORK-able top from Hot Topic!

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This tie-bottom Honeyduke’s blouse features your favorite sweets from HP: chocolate frogs, sugar quills, cauldron cakes, iced mice, and more!

 

If I were able to visit Diagon Alley for realsies, the absolute FIRST place I would go would be Weasley Wizard Wheeze’s! Think if I was wearing this dress I’d get a discount?

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Not only does this dress highlight some of the best part of the ginger brothers’ inventory (like pygmy puffs and exploding hats) but IT. HAS. POCKETS. That’s the dream!

 

Anyone else want to just curl up next to the fire at The Burrow (the Weasley’s home) and have Momma Molly make you a nice treackle tart and a glass of tea? Well, now we can kind of get that warm fuzzy feeling with this AWESOME 3-D puzzle of the Weasley’s home!

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“Its not much, but its home.”

“I think its brilliant!” Same, Harry. SAME.

 

Looking for something a bit more magical for the next family game night? Look no further than the Harry Potter edition of Headbandz!

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Available at Barnes and Noble stores, this game is sure to be a favorite of kids and adults alike!

 

Saving for a trip to Harry Potter World next summer? Maybe a holiday in London? You’ll need a place to keep your funds safe from sticky fingers. Look no further than the most secure bank in the world (and it fits on your dresser)!

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Oh yes, my dear, that IS a ceramic Gringott’s Bank (from geeky supplier Box Lunch) to hold your Sickles, Galleons, and Knuts! Or, you know, your Muggle money. Whatevs.

 

 

Happy fangirling!

Mommy Monday

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The other day, I felt like a chicken with my head cut off. I had so many errands to run, places to go, and things to get accomplished. The kids and I will soon be back at our church’s Mother’s Day Out program and Huff the Tot’s birthday party is next weekend so there’s been a lot to prep.

After a whirlwind day of shopping, organizing, writing, cutting out lamination, and wrapping gifts and goody bags, I collapsed on my bed at 10:00 p.m. I almost immediately  sat back up.

Did the kids get at least two servings of fruit today? 

Did I give them enough attention? 

Was I too short-tempered? 

Did I give them enough hugs? Kisses? 

Should I have read one more book at bedtime? 

This is almost a daily ritual with me. Its like I can’t go to sleep until I’ve listed all the things I’ve done wrong as a mom and vowed to make the next day better.

As I wrestled with myself about how much of a terrible mother I was, I started mindlessly scrolling through Facebook. Then, I came across a video a friend had posted. (I’m not entirely sure who Rachel Hollis is, but I’m glad she made this video!) It was EXACTLY what I needed to hear. In the short video, she says God made you and your child a perfect match. She elaborates by telling the worn-out, worried mom:

“You can’t fail at a job you were created to do.” 

WOW.

That got me. I started crying and told myself that I know for a fact my children went to bed that night knowing that I love them. And THAT was proof I wasn’t failing.

Here’s the video in case you need to hear her words of wisdom too, Momma. You’re doing great.

Try It Tuesday

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Even though “swimsuit season” is over, I’m wanting to get back into shape (I’ve let myself slack off A LOT lately) and get back some of my strength that I’ve lost but I also needed a workout that wouldn’t take too long because, let’s face it, its tough to wake up early so a workout I could do in the short time Huff the Babe naps in the afternoon is ideal. I looked on my Pinterest board and decided to try out one of the many workouts I’ve pinned but never tried! I scoped out wheat I had and settled on this one:

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I thought to myself, “Eh, this can’t be too hard, right? The website said it would take 30 minutes and I’m pretty fit. I can do this.”

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BRUH. It was tough. By the time I made it to the burpees I was like, “Yeeeeaaahhh… not doing that.” Thankfully, it didn’t take thirty minutes to complete, it only took fifteen! But LAWD, it was a rough fifteen minutes! Check out my stats from my FitBit:

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Now I’m sticking to the Jillian 30 Day Shred (I’m on Day 27!) and then I’ll kick it up a notch with another workout. But this is a great way to burn a lot of calories in a short amount of time!

What’s your go-to workout? Share in the comments below!

Mommy Monday

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I’ve been working really hard at losing a few pounds/getting back into shape the past few months (I’ve really let myself slack this summer) and that means Momma is taking in fewer calories than she’s burning. Which means I am hungry quite often. And when I’m hungry, well, its not a pretty sight.

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So when I saw this video from The Holderness Family, it spoke to me on a spiritual level.

 

Can you (or your kiddos) relate?