It’s that time of year again. A time when we all gather around, eat delicious meals, dress up in clothes, and internally scream at everyone around us. Wait, what? Nobody else does that? Just me? Cool.
In all seriousness, I really do love the holidays! Though now that I’m an adult with two kids, I have to admit that it’s not as magical as it used to be.
Last night we had Huffman Thanksgiving at the in-laws. Or, as my children thought it was called, “Let’s Have Meltdowns Simultaneously Making Mommy Lose Her Mind While We’re Wearing Fancy Clothes Day”.
On the ride home, Huff the Hubs said, “Now that we’re parents, Thanksgiving and Christmas just don’t seem as much fun.”
I agreed. Then, as if right on cue, Huff the Tot piped up, “Wow, Mommy, look at those lights!” (A house was decorated for Christmas) “It’s so beautiful!”
Being the emotional basket case that I am, I felt tears well up in my eyes because though I had had a very tiring evening, she could still see the world through her innocent kid eyes.
Which leads me to the subject of today’s post: How to Get Through The Holidays Without Losing Your Ish.
One of the things I like to do is make a list of things that are stressing me out and figure out how I can cope with each stressor. I thought of the main stresses most of us (and by “us” I mean women) have this time of year and some solutions to get you through!
Being expected to cook everything and clean up.
Luckily, I’m not expected to do any major cooking. I’m an okay cook, but my family loves their traditional Thanksgiving foods and they like it how it’s always been made (i.e., mostly by my Grammy and mom) and we’re not a group that is in love with change so I won’t rock the boat. Anyway, I digress… BUT, if you are the one who is up at 5:00 a.m. basting, chopping, and sautéing, listen to what I’m about to say: DO NOT CLEAN UP AFTER ANYONE. Seriously. You have done enough. I don’t care if its tradition for the men-folk to watch football while the women clean. That’s outdated and misogynistic and it needs to end. Just like people are assigned what to bring to a family function, (e.g., Suzy brings stuffing, Bill brings cranberry sauce) there should be assigned dish washers and trash can emptiers. If you’re the one hosting and opening your home, DO NOT CLEAN. This is basically why people have children—free labor. Put those that didn’t cook (or are too young to cook) in charge of clearing plates and scrubbing casserole dishes. Better yet—use paper products and the clean-up is faster! Delegate—and do it early—so you’re not treated like a house elf!
The family member that wants to talk politics.
This year, all political talk needs to be banned from family functions. I’m serious. When you (or whomever) makes the call telling other family members what time the Turkey Day festivities are going down, add in a little disclaimer that there is a moratorium on political talk this Thursday. If that one uncle of yours just can’t seem to stop from flapping his gums about the Electoral College, just crank up the Adele:
Listening to your kid (see: toddler) whine about not wanting any of the Thanksgiving food.
This was Huff the Tot last night. She didn’t want anything to do with the turkey, green beans, mashed potatoes, or stuffing. And you know what? I can already tell you I will not be in the mood to pick that battle later this week at my grandparents’ house. So I WILL be preparing. I’m taking a Lunchable and half of a PBJ. Because it will not matter if my child doesn’t eat giblet gravy, but I AM going to make sure she eats something (and this momma ain’t cooking an extra meal!).
The fear of getting shanked at Walmart on Black Friday.
I used to LOVE Black Friday, back before it became (as I like to call it) “Gray Thursday”. My family and I would make t-shirts, have call signs, and then meet up at Waffle House for a victory breakfast, swapping war stories about our deals. Now that the stores are open on Thanksgiving, it kind of takes the fun out of it. But, fear not! About 99% of the deals that are in store you can find online! The last two years I have bought the majority of my Black Friday swag online and didn’t necessarily have to get out! Word of advice though, do NOT get on the Walmart or Target website RIGHT at midnight. Everyone does that and the websites are suuuuuper slow. You’ll end up staying up until 6:00 a.m. Thanksgiving morning because of it. Trust me.
I’ve been very open about my struggle with depression and anxiety. It sucks. And sometimes it can really get in the way of letting a person enjoy special occasions. Something that has always helped me in the past was having a place I could escape to collect myself. At my Grammy’s house, there are four bedrooms and an enclosed staircase. Sometimes when it gets too loud or I’m feeling a panic attack some on, I slip to one of the back rooms or staircase and take a few minutes to breathe and regain my composure. (My essential oils anxiety blend has also been a real helped!)
The holidays should be fun, enjoyable, and filled with fun memories. But that doesn’t mean they also aren’t stressful and make you want to curl up in a ball with a bottle of Cupcake! Do you have any tips for surviving the holidays? Share in the comments below!