Ain’t No Party Like an Oscar Party

Now that Downton Abbey is over, I lamented the fact that my Sunday nights would no longer be filled with the rich and infamous dressed in fancy gowns, arguing over who is better than whom while feigning niceties to those around them.

 

My sadness was short lived when I remembered that the Oscars were coming and I’d be able to see the exact same thing, minus the British accents.

 

Really, the only awards show that I watch is the Academy Awards. Because, honestly, it’s the only one that matters. The Golden Globes, the SAGs, and even the Critics Choice are comparable to a smiley face sticker on your homework. The Oscars, however, are like that medal you received for perfect attendance and everyone in the school had to clap for you while you stood there looking smug. Yeah, the Oscars are THAT cool.

 

Granted, I went to bed after Adele sang so I didn’t get to see the “major” awards handed out. But, I did watch a short recap and came up with my favorite moments of the night:

 

1. Joseph Gordon Levitt and Daniel Radcliffe Singing and Dancing.

I. LOVE. JGL. And Dan-Rad. I’ve missed my lighting-scarred pal ever since the curtain closed on Harry Potter (and I refuse to see The Woman In Black. I don’t need nightmares.) And Joseph is so freakin’ cute. I’ve loved him since he was a long-haired alien on Third Rock From the Sun. Put the two of them together and you get a squealing, giggling me.

 

2. Seth McFarlane’s Inappropriate Boob Song

Yes, it may have been crude. But its Seth McFarlane. Its like inviting Mariah Carey to sing karaoke and then getting upset when she hogs the mic. Its to be expected. (Also, I loved how Seth said that nobody had seen Jennifer Lawrence’s boobs and it went to a pre-recorded shot of her saying “Yesss!” Love that girl.)

 

3. Christopher Plummer Being Awesome

"I defeated the Nazis with singing children and a nun. What have you done today?"

“I defeated the Nazis with singing children and a nun. What have you done today?”

Dude may be 150 years old, but he is still looking good. And he’s pretty quick-witted and seems to still have a way with the ladies. I swear I saw him wink and Helen Hunt at some point while on stage. Like a boss.

 

4. Anne Hathaway’s Acceptance Speech

Let me clarify: I didn’t like her speech. Every time she feigns humility and tries to come up with a clever joke, she always falls flat.  And last night when she received yet another award for a movie she was in 45 minutes, I grew weary of her again. When she stood up on the stage and looked at her award and said “It came true” I wanted to vomit. Not only that, but she kept sounding like she was out of breath. I was like, “Anne. You were sitting on the front freaking row! How can you be out of breath?! You either need to up your cardio or get an inhaler.”

 

5. Kristen Stewart Looking Like A Train Wreck

Homegirl looked a hot mess. Normally when I see her in magazines, not smiling and un-showered, I don’t really think anything of it. But last night was the biggest night in Hollywood. When I saw K Stew hobbling onto the Red Carpet, I literally gasped. Why, why would you show up to the Academy Awards and not wash your hair?! And also, if you’re on crutches, you need to wear a dress that will not slip and make you have many “quick saves”. Also, when she presented with Dan Rad, she obviously looked like she couldn’t care less that she was there. The exasperated sighs were enough for me to yell at the TV: “OMG, don’t go next year!” (In all honesty, she probably didn’t want to go this year. Seeing as how the entire cast and crew of Snow White and the Hunstman were there and everybody knows about her and the director’s sexcapades.) But still, you didn’t have to go, K Stew.

 

 

Fan Girl Friday

Do you hear a high-pitch squeal? It’s coming from movie theaters all around the country. Why? Because the last installment of the Twilight Saga, Breaking Dawn Part 2 opened last night at midnight (or 10:00 p.m., depending on where you live).

I’ve been to every midnight showing of the Twilight films, but not this one. I’m okay with that though; I think I may be getting too old to stay up that late (last New Year’s Eve, I fell asleep at 8:00.) And though I’m going to be relieved that the Twilight sensation is over with, I’m still a little sad to see them end.

Since I have to work, I didn’t get to do the super fun Twilight marathon down at Harkins, but I do have Breaking Dawn Part 1 playing in the background as I type. Watching the movie makes me think back to the first film and all the anticipation. So with the end of films, I thought it’d be fun to look over my favorite Twilight moments:

1. Robert Pattison cast as Edward.

When I first read Twilight, I had no idea it was being made into a movie. I can’t really remember the mental picture I had painted as to what my Edward looked like, but when I saw Rob Pattinson had been cast I was like, “Hey! Isn’t that Cedric Diggory?!” I remember him because all the girls thought he was soooo cute when Goblet of Fire came out, but I was like, “That guy?! He’s forehead is ENORMOUS!”

“Don’t like my face? I’ll just bite your head off. Literally.”

Now, however, the five-head has grown on me.

2. Seeing the cast at Comic-Con

I primarily went to Comic Con in ’09 for two reasons: 1., to see David Tennant and 2., to see the cast of New Moon. I. COULDN’T. WAIT. The morning of the panel, we woke up early and got in line at the convention center. When the cast walked on the stage, there was an explosion of applause. And I, being who I am, yelled out to K Stew: “Nice mullet!” I’m so mature.

“OMG, I’m so like, too hip for this.”

3. Going to the midnight showings.

When Eclipse came out, my devotion to the red-eyed vamps was starting to wane. So much so that I asked my sister to make me and my other sister shirts that read: Team Volturi.

Yum.

I’ve also seen some awesome shirts that read: Team Guy That Almost Hit Bella with a Car. Gotta love cynicism.

4. The parodies.

I. LOVE. PARODIES. Especially when they make fun of something I like. I feel like I can laugh more at something if I’m involved in the hype. These two are, by far, my favorite parodies of the Twilight craze:

5. Bella’s Pregnancy.

Pregnancy is a beautiful and magical time in a woman’s life. Unless you’re Bella Cullen. Homegirl looked a hot mess in BD1. And, being the petty person I am, I enjoyed it.

“They didn’t cover this in ‘What to Expect When You’re Expecting a Demon’.”

Bonus:

6. I’m most looking forward to the surprise ending. My sister up in Maryland saw the movie last night and said that the ending is more jaw-dropping than you could imagine! Now, I’m starting to get excited.

What about you? Are you excited about the movie?